Sunday, July 12, 2009

Checking in!

Greetings and hallucinations! Hope this finds everyone well and happy.

Life is very good. Work is going well, I have an active social life, my cult keeps me busy and my job is secure. I am a lucky, lucky woman.

I put writing and blogging on hold for a few months to focus on other areas requiring my attention. No regrets for doing so, but now I need to think about resurrecting my story and taking another stab at getting the words from my brain to paper.

This time I will concentrate on maintaining balance between the various parts of my life that need my attention. I won't punish myself for not being able to partipate in NANORIMO or other challenges. If I want to not blog for a while, I hereby give myself permission. I will write when the story flows from me and not berate myself when it doesn't.

I want to write, but I'm not driven by it. Perhaps that's a result of my comfortable life.

Whatever happens - I'll be hanging out here occasionally and will visit some of my favorites once in a while.

I'm well. I'm happy. Life is good. Hope you are the same.

Monday, February 2, 2009

Today's lesson: They're, their and there

Reading has occupied much of my scarce spare time lately. It takes a lot to irritate me, but the recent spate of misusing the words there, their and they’re has steam rolling out my ears. So, here’s today’s lesson on the proper usage of there, their and they’re.

First – THEY’RE

This is a contraction. It means they are. That’s all it is – ever!

Second – THERE

The primary use of there is as a location. “It’s there.” “Go over there.” They live there.”

As an adverb, it is:
1. used to introduce sentences in which a state, fact etc is being announced. "There has been an accident at the factory; There seems to be something wrong; I don't want there to be any mistakes in this. "

2. means at that time; at that point in a speech, argument etc. "There I cannot agree with you; Don't stop there – tell me what happened next!"

3 (with the subject of the sentence following the verb except when it is a pronoun) used at the beginning of a sentence, usually with be or go, to draw attention to, or point out, someone or something. "There she goes now! There it is! "

4 (placed immediately after noun) used for emphasis or to point out someone or something. "That book there is the one you need."

As an interjection, it is
1 used to calm or comfort. "There, now. Things aren't as bad as they seem."

2 used when a person has been shown to be correct, when something bad happens, or when something has been completed. "There! I told you he would do it! There! That's that job done. There! I said you would hurt yourself!"

The primary point here is; there is not a person or persons – ever!

Third – THEIR

This is a possessive form of THEY

As an adjective

1 belonging to them. "This is their car. Take a note of their names and addresses."

2 used instead of his, his or her etc where a person of unknown sex or people of both sexes are referred to. " Everyone should buy his own ticket. Everyone should buy their own ticket."

As a pronoun,
a person, thing etc belonging to them. "The child is theirs. He’s a friend of theirs. He’s one of their friends."

Their is not a location – ever!

Please, please, please – I beg you – use them correctly.

All assistance courtesy of

Are you using these words correctly? What word misuse sends steam rolling from your ears?

Friday, January 16, 2009


Bleak and dire predictions, stock market crashing, massive debt and unemployment, savings wiped out and homes foreclosed. 2009 started out with a depressing thud.

In Seattle we had the snow from hell – happily downplayed by Mayor Snowpuff Marshmallow Man. Then ark inspiring rain fell to ruin lives and livelihoods.

Hope. Where’s the hope? Where’s the promise for a brighter future? Where’s the inspiration? Not a person – a sign of better things to come. In the media we only hear what’s wrong and how difficult and long it will be to repair. A little bit of hope – that’s all I ask.

Then yesterday, on a foggy day in Seattle, a bright ray of sunshine appeared on the Hudson River in New York. It illuminated the country and world and reminded us of all the reasons we have to hope.

On January 20th another ray will shine – this time as our new president is sworn in. Change won’t come immediately – but I have hope.

Pain under my shoulder blade that spread to my head creating shockwave headaches exacerbated by typing – my reason for not blogging much lately. With a new doctor, physical therapy and minimal drugs, things are improving daily. Other than that, my life is very pleasant and full of hope.

Are you well and happy? Do you have hope?

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Happy New Year

That was perfect! Thank you Uncle Jay. Will you marry me?

Reverse psychology, by its most rudimentary definition, infers that to get someone to do something we must tell them to do the exact opposite. For years, New Year's resolutions made were New Year's resolutions unkept for me. So this year I hope to use reverse psychology on myself so at the end of the year I can say I actually kept some of my resolutions.

So here are my reverse psychology resolutions for 2009! (In reverse order of course)

10. To not win more than a million dollars in any lotto, lottery, mega-millions or anything else I forget to enter.

9. To gain 20 or more pounds.

8. To be broke and homeless.

7. To be sickly and infirm.

6. To have no friends.

5. To lose my job.

4. To lose my appetite for chocolate and hamburgers.

3. To have no clothes and walk naked throughout the Pacific Northwest.

2. To lose my memories.

1. To not finish the cozy mystery lounging happily in my head and partially on my computer.

There you have it! My reverse psychology resolutions. Any bets on how many I won't keep? Any you want to add?

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Happy Holidays!

Merry Christmas

Happy Hanukkah

Happy Kwanzaa


Whatever you celebrate at this time of year, I hope it brings you joy.

I'm fine - just really, really busy. Thanks to everyone who e-mailed or left messages. It's nice to not be forgotten.

Hugs to all!

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Late to the Moonie Lovefest!

Crap! Crap! Crap! I got so caught up in the sunny blue skies, sparkling blue-green water, warm soft sand, tropical breezes, mai-tais and all the Hawaii ambiance, I forgot to post my Moonie appreciation. That's what I get for not opening my computer for a week!

You are the greatest and we all appreciate your wisdom and expertise - and snarky sense of humor. Thanks for all you do!


Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Falling back into a routine

At my new age, it takes longer to recover from big events.

I had a wonderful birthday and truly appreciate all the great messages everyone left on my blog. It was lovely.

It seems most blogs are now full of either election related content or cheers for NaNoWriMo. For those who plan to participate - best wishes to you. With only 4 days in November with nothing on the calendar, I have to pass this year. Can't you do this in January - the calendar is much clearer then and the weather more conducive to staying inside and writing? Lynn Viehl has some excellent advice on her blog today for those who are participating.

I was in Eastern Washington last weekend which means a trip through our beautiful mountain passes. The pictures are from Highway 2 that goes over Stevens Pass.

The fall colors are spectacular this year. The golds and reds are vibrant and the leaves shimmer on the trees.
I took these pictures while driving through the pass at high rates of speed. Aren't digital cameras great? Stopping and getting out of the car would be required otherwise.

Next week I'm off to Hawaii and our annual conference. Because I'm in charge of all the arrangements, it's a lot of work - but it is Hawaii! And, I'm going to spend some time with Pat Wood on Orion. Have I told you lately how much I love my job?

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Just a phone call

That would have been nice.

My 60th birthday was spectacular – as close to perfection as possible. But a phone call would have been nice.

My day started with a phone call from my favorite 7 year old (the son of a co-worker) singing Happy Birthday and telling me he loves me. Sigh!

At the office, my cubicle was decorated to the hilt. To get into it, crepe paper and balloons had to be moved aside. My bosses and co-workers took me to lunch at a very nice restaurant, made me wear a silly hat and sang as I blew out candles on the cake. I received expensive presents from my bosses and wonderful presents and cards from everyone – then another cake for the whole office (about 50 people) about 2:30. No phone call yet.

Left work at 3 and was greeted by 4 friends at home who took me out to dinner and then home for more cake and presents. There was a wonderful card from my little sister, Dr. Anonymouse with a very generous gift card. Have I mentioned lately how much I love my little sister?

Saturday was another day of celebrating with friends and off to another dinner. Still, no call.

Sunday, Dr. Anonymouse called to see if I was still alive from all the celebrating and to fill me in on her news. Couldn’t talk too long because my contractor was getting ready to leave and I needed to go over some things with him. But no other call.

It’s Tuesday. I’m 60 + 4days now. Life is settling back to normal. My friends, by blogging friends and my little sister made my birthday fabulous.

My mother and older sister forgot.

Just a phone call. That would have been nice.

Friday, October 10, 2008

Wisdom of the Aged - Part III

On change

A wise woman once told me, “You can change.” So, I did! It’s harder than hell but it can be done. The most difficult part is convincing people you’ve known for years that you have actually changed. Many people don’t like change and don’t deal with it well. They cling to the past as if to a lifebuoy, afraid of what’s ahead even if what’s behind was worse.

People try to keep you in the past, or continue to make references to how you were instead of letting you move forward. It isn’t always malicious. They may not realize what they’re saying or how they’re acting is hurtful. They haven’t come to terms with their past experiences and allowing you to move forward would force them to deal with their own issues. I understand this and am happy to have found a way out of the maze. I try to live in the present, not the past or the future - to live every day as if it’s the only day that matters because it just may be.

Changing is a constant struggle and requires unwavering attention and introspection. Sometimes to accomplish it, you have to distance yourself from your past. You have to put space between yourself and the memories of who you were. Sometimes that space requires a physical move – far away where you can start fresh without all the people around to remind you of how completely you screwed up your life. It can be emotionally isolating but also liberating. It requires making a decision about what’s most important – placating other people, or making yourself happy.

I don’t blame anyone for my bad choices. That’s the easy thing to do and shifts responsibility for my decisions to others. Once I left home my decisions were all mine. No one forced me to do anything. Some people influenced me more than others but no one controlled my mind. I accept full responsibility for everything that happened to me. I live every day with the knowledge of my past mistakes but I don’t suffer from them anymore. I learned from them and moved on to a much happier life.

I don’t see myself as selling out for not taking my family and others to task for what they did or said to me years ago. I see it more as me taking back control of my life. They no longer have the ability to make me feel bad or inadequate because I won’t let them. They have no more power over me and what I do or how I feel. My choices in life are no longer dictated by what they might think or feel about me.

People who aren’t content with themselves will never be content with another person. Dragging another person into my issues isn’t going to solve them. It’s just going to make two people miserable.

I haven’t forgotten anything from my past. That’s both a problem and an advantage of having a good memory. I remember everything – good and bad, funny and sad, except for a few hours in Haiti, I remember it all. I remember the situations, the emotions that accompanied them and the pain they caused. However, I no longer feel the pain or suffer from the memories. I learned how to put the pain away and replaced it with the comfort of knowing I not only survived it, I grew and prospered.

I’ll never forget. I don’t want to. It keeps me humble and in touch with what’s important. I’m not just a survivor. I thrive. I made a conscious choice to live my life happy. I may be temporarily affected by what people say or do but I have no intention of allowing anyone to permanently change my choice to enjoy life.

I did some pretty stupid things in my past but don’t do them anymore and I don’t allow others to make me wallow in them either. Holding on to memories of how you were wronged is not going to make things right again. Forgiving (or at least forgetting) will. We have to move forward and leave the wrongdoers in our past where they belong.

Choices can be proactive or reactive. You can live life from the outside in, always focusing on external things to provide you with stimulus and meaning, or you can live life from the inside out by giving external things stimulus and meaning. You can live by your own decisions or you can live based on the decisions of others. You can live your dreams or you can live the dreams of others. It’s your choice. You have to define yourself not allow others to do it for you.

I haven’t resolved all the issues in my life, but most things that were so important and urgent 25 years ago are now either non-issues or under control. I appreciate life and have something a lot of people who had cancer or any serious disease will never have - the opportunity to continue working on my issues and looking for solutions.

I have hope for the future and a present full of good friends, a wonderful job, several “families” and a darling dog who thinks I am the greatest – especially when I give her treats. And best of all, I no longer aspire to be a drama queen. I’m very fond of my easy, comfortable, low trauma way of life. If I wasn’t me, I might just envy me!

I have lots of love in my life but not the love of my life. That’s okay. One of those unresolved issues is a fear of relationships. I don’t want to be a hotel again and I don’t want to check into any more hotels. I have too much self esteem now to do that again. There’s a real difference between being alone and being lonely. I recognize the difference and am happier alone than I ever was in a relationship. That doesn’t mean I’ve given up the idea of finding true love, just that without it, it’s still good.

Writing this gives me another opportunity to maintain my perspective. I can focus on the fact I had this health issue – cancer - that overwhelmed me and redirected my life for over twenty five years, or remember that the health issue was my catalyst for change and brought me where I am today. What an interesting conundrum. Did I have the disease, or did I allow it to have me? Or, both? And does it really matter?

Life should be a blessing. Always maintain your perspective. Don’t be afraid to take chances. Don’t be afraid of the unknown. Never give up hope. You can change.

Happy Birthday to me!

WooHoo! Let's Party!

Welcome to my 60th birthday party!

Here's what greeted me when I arrived at work today!